Life in LADA land

Living Philippians 1:6 with type 1.5 diabetes

Better days

I have noticed that overall things have been better for me diabetically-speaking for the past few weeks. Despite busy days, and summer heat, I think I can honestly say that my blood sugar control has been better.  There’s not just one thing that has made that happen, it’s a combination of a bunch of little things.  And it has had some interesting effects on me.

First, why has my blood sugar been better behaved despite a relatively crazy summer schedule?  I went into summer expecting the worst. That might not be the best approach, but there it is.  I think I can name some of the things that contributed to overall better control. First, technical issues.  I am changing out my pump more frequently lately – every 2 1/2 days or so, rather than every 4 (don’t tell my CDE that I used to go that long).  That means fewer failed infusion sites, and the insulin is just ‘fresher’.  I have also been more careful not to let my pump run down to less than 20 units of  insulin, since at that lower level, I seem to get a lot more high bg numbers.  I don’t know why, it just happens. So avoiding those low levels of insulin in my trusty pump just makes life  better.

I’m also eating better. There is still plenty of room for improvement, but overall I am eating a lower carb diet, and the carbs I do eat tend to be fresh fruit and veggies.  I love summer’s bounty of fresh foods!  This means fewer spikes in my bg, and less time dealing with serious highs and lows.  Nice.

There are probably all kinds of other physiological and technical issues that I have no awareness of  that explain why my blood sugar has been more stable this summer.  But the other thing that I have noticed is that my emotional response to all things diabetes is less volatile.  I think the reason this has become so noticeable to me is that 2 people close to me, who are very aware of my day to day struggles with this disease, have noticed this and commented on it.  So it’s real, and not just my imagination or wishful thinking.  So what’s up with this?

First of all, the fact that my bg hasn’t been so wildly erratic helps with the emotional control, no doubt about it.  But my thinking HAS changed.  My heart has changed.  My center of faith is restored.  God is on the throne, not Colleen.  I feel like I am learning to lean into God for strength, not try to handle all of the stress of dealing with diabetes on my own.  It makes a HUGE difference.  When I really think about the Truth of what God in  Christ has done for me, it makes diabetes seems so much easier to deal with.  Highs, lows, failed infusion sites, more needle sticks than I ever wanted – all these things pale in comparison to the Cross.  That’s where I go for strength, and hope, and peace. And I find it.  This is not trivial, and I hope not temporary.  It does take energy and thought, and time in the Scriptures to fix my focus. And diabetes, like being a Christian, is not something I can do alone.  I’m grateful I have people to encourage and support me along the way and God sustaining me through it all.

Leave a comment »